Redwolf's Journal (continued)

So there I was, playing some Sly Cooper game. I was replaying a level that consisted of making it down a huge mountainside to a cartoony style military compound. With this crazy idea in my head, I decided to see if I could paraglide across the whole level. It worked. Pretty cool. But there was no level exit, which got me wondering if I'd screwed up the game somehow, or if I was really supposed to be going UP the mountain to a different base. Then I was sneaking through the (more realistic) base, Solid Snake-style. I was something between MacGuyver and a secret agent, there to affect the rescue of the Queen of England who had some secret information on her when she and a number of party-goers had been captured by some terrorist cult that was making use of the base. ... About the time I was being discovered, some OTHER group showed up, specifically after the cultists, causing enough chaos and destruction for me to accomplish my mission. I got the captives out, retrieved the jewelry...

*sigh* *flump* Emotions are tricky for me online. Sure, it's just text, but anyone who thinks emotion cannot be conveyed in this medium is fooling him/herself. All too frequently, I find bad moods passed to and from friends while MUCKing. Sometimes there's even cheering-up that happens. What's that have to do with anything? Well, tonight, I found my mood spiraling down while playing. As frustrated and annoyed as I got, I actually think I managed to remain civil. I didn't see anyone pulled down with me, and I didn't hear anyone asking what was wrong. It appears my deliberate efforts to avoid snapping really did manage to hide how I felt. That's unusual, in that I often don't have that much self-control. Is that a victory? It feels odd to say, but it is to me. Some of my friends are sympathetic enough that sharing my annoyances tends to drag them down into foul moods as well. To me, it's a success to avoid doing that, even if it means hiding how I fe...

Just a couple things I've neglected to comment on. Sly 3 (PS2): Short, but a pretty good game. I've thoroughly enjoyed the series since I was introduced to it even though I'm not a big fan of platform games. Serenity: Very good sci-fi movie. I don't think it matters so much if you were a fan of Firefly - my experience with the series was limited. If you're a sci-fi fan and actually haven't seen Serenity, you should. To say anything about what makes it good or what few critical comments I might have would hint at things in the movie. It's better to not know, and just watch it.

Well, I attended my first "annual" Homeowners Association meeting last night. This after having lived where I am for about a month shy of two years. It wasn't even my fault. They actually didn't have one last year, and in 2003 I was somehow not on record (thus didn't receive notice) even though I was perfectly settled in by the time the meeting happened in December. The complex has 23 units. 7 owners were present and several had written in, essentially making our property manager their proxy. As far as organization goes, things were very laid back, barely following any sort of protocol. The discussion, however, did get a bit heated. Mind you, no one was directing that at anyone else present, but there were still some strong feelings voiced. The big topic, taking about two-thirds of the hour-and-a-half meeting: dogs. By the rules, dogs are not allowed. In the last month, there have been increasingly blatant violations, including a quartet of pit bulls in one fe...

Part of yesterday's strangeness was a trip to the local shire meeting. I haven't been to one in... a long time. Heck, I haven't been to an SCA event in years. More than anything, it made me feel lost. There was a time in my life when the SCA held great appeal. I wanted to be a light weapons fighter. I wanted to look good. I wanted to do well. And somewhere in there I stepped off the path. Yesterday, I listened to an explanation of many of the Society's awards. I heard a duchess say, in essence, "If you do what you enjoy because you enjoy it, the awards will come to you" and "If you're doing something for an award, you're doing it for the wrong reason." To me, that's common sense. It reminded me, however, of how I felt when I unofficially 'left' the Society (that is to say, I gave up trying to participate). I felt as though nothing I had done had been recognized. And while I had not be doing those things for recognition, I had ...

Yesterday was one of those days that reminds me of what my life is not and, in turn, what it is. Some people thrive in the city. They go to clubs. They party. They look for adventure in 'everyday life.' ... That's not me. I don't feel comfortable at large social functions. I feel worse about the bar/club scene. I don't feel a need to 'do something' every night. While other people have fled this town and cursed it as boring, the pace and feel of it suits me just fine. So now I wonder about that. Some of it is simple choice, but I think some of it comes from seeing the world differently from those people. Why? I could point to several experiences in my youth, but I don't know if I can truly assign all blame there. My mother and I moved a lot in my pre-high school years. Does that really explain why I seem to bond with people so differently that what seems to be the 'norm?' Does that explain why it's *work* for me to find proper anecdotes fo...

I have an obsessive side. Usually, this manifests in my consumerism - I see something I really want and getting it will become a quest of sorts. Thankfully, we're usually talking about a video game or a book rather than, say, a car. Most recently, I was inspired by Revenge of the Sith to start thinking about a Star Wars RPG. Picking up a couple Jedi Knight video games probably didn't help. I already had the core rulebook and a couple others. That didn't feel like enough for running the sort of game I was envisioning (and since no one else seemed likely to do it, I figured I would be GMing). I decided I really wanted two other books - The Dark Side Sourcebook, and Power of the Jedi. What's Star Wars without the Force, neh? Normally, this would be a simple matter of hitting Amazon.com and ordering the books. This time, that failed. After a couple weeks, the estimated ship time went from 2-3 weeks to "out of print and unavailable." A couple people were sellin...