Feh. But Only a Little Bit
Eh, I'm not really down, per se, but feel a tiny bit in that direction, if that makes sense.
My car is running. The water heater is heating water without spilling it all over. My sink repairs seem to be successful. I have functioning video and audio for my desktop PC. All of these are good things that bring life back to "normal." In the process, though, my summer was a few thousand dollars more expensive than it otherwise would have been. That isn't world-shatteringly painful, but it does make me more conservative with spending. I've definitely held back on a few games I otherwise would have picked up.
It also means when I saw some clothing online and thought "hey, this is a cool style that could go with the costume stuff I was making," I had to take a step back. My sorta-spending-freeze kind of halted my work in that regard. And while there are certainly some things I could do with the things I've already gathered, my drive to do any costuming has been killed by having to work and worry about more pressing matters. So now, I rather suspect I'm unable to really get things together for Halloween, as I may have hoped previously. Even if I applied myself on the work front, the additional purchases aren't very likely. That's a bit of a bummer.
There's also a little bit of post-series "depression" from having watched through the Steven Universe episodes I missed over the weekend as well as the "movie" on Monday. I retain a great fondness for the series, even if I wrote it off initially as being a cutesy show about magical kid adventures. It managed to develop a strong narrative with solid call-backs and foreshadowing. It managed to be very much about relationships and family throughout in a way that is really a little mind-boggling. Like most cartoons, it still boiled things down to an overly-simplistic level so they could be resolved, but the heart of the problems posed were often realistic (hurt feelings, misunderstandings, etc.). And it did all this with some moving little songs here and there. That's all a pretty great accomplishment. I've seen rumors of a season six still coming, but I don't know that continuation is necessary at this point.
Aaaaand, sometimes I rather dislike being able to foresee certain things so well when it comes to interactions with people, particularly in my online roleplaying circles.
Yeah, I knew when one person reached out about getting involved in some things again that I would log in for a couple days with that group, not really find a spot to fit into events-in-progress, log on a few more days during which everyone is idle doing something else, then fall back out of the habit after about a week.
Meanwhile, the recent online superheroes game is... hmm... having difficulty gaining traction with me? It might have been a bit better if I had spent more time in making my character more overtly social or something rather than clinging to the idea that blossomed in my mind. As I pretty much predicted, however, being a game run in Discord channels with one set time per week and other "play whenever" stuff happening for people between, it's become difficult to track for me. A lot of what goes on isn't "critically important," but it does develop characters (both through actual interaction and mechanical karma awards). I'm baaaaad at "inviting myself into" scenes these days, so my character's managed to appear in one non-primary-session scene (and only one primary session due to another being called off). And as more of these happen (whether I'm around or not), it only makes me feel more alienated and less inclined to dive in. I kind of wonder how there could be any other outcome, but clearly that kind of game setup works better for some people than it does for me.
My car is running. The water heater is heating water without spilling it all over. My sink repairs seem to be successful. I have functioning video and audio for my desktop PC. All of these are good things that bring life back to "normal." In the process, though, my summer was a few thousand dollars more expensive than it otherwise would have been. That isn't world-shatteringly painful, but it does make me more conservative with spending. I've definitely held back on a few games I otherwise would have picked up.
It also means when I saw some clothing online and thought "hey, this is a cool style that could go with the costume stuff I was making," I had to take a step back. My sorta-spending-freeze kind of halted my work in that regard. And while there are certainly some things I could do with the things I've already gathered, my drive to do any costuming has been killed by having to work and worry about more pressing matters. So now, I rather suspect I'm unable to really get things together for Halloween, as I may have hoped previously. Even if I applied myself on the work front, the additional purchases aren't very likely. That's a bit of a bummer.
There's also a little bit of post-series "depression" from having watched through the Steven Universe episodes I missed over the weekend as well as the "movie" on Monday. I retain a great fondness for the series, even if I wrote it off initially as being a cutesy show about magical kid adventures. It managed to develop a strong narrative with solid call-backs and foreshadowing. It managed to be very much about relationships and family throughout in a way that is really a little mind-boggling. Like most cartoons, it still boiled things down to an overly-simplistic level so they could be resolved, but the heart of the problems posed were often realistic (hurt feelings, misunderstandings, etc.). And it did all this with some moving little songs here and there. That's all a pretty great accomplishment. I've seen rumors of a season six still coming, but I don't know that continuation is necessary at this point.
Aaaaand, sometimes I rather dislike being able to foresee certain things so well when it comes to interactions with people, particularly in my online roleplaying circles.
Yeah, I knew when one person reached out about getting involved in some things again that I would log in for a couple days with that group, not really find a spot to fit into events-in-progress, log on a few more days during which everyone is idle doing something else, then fall back out of the habit after about a week.
Meanwhile, the recent online superheroes game is... hmm... having difficulty gaining traction with me? It might have been a bit better if I had spent more time in making my character more overtly social or something rather than clinging to the idea that blossomed in my mind. As I pretty much predicted, however, being a game run in Discord channels with one set time per week and other "play whenever" stuff happening for people between, it's become difficult to track for me. A lot of what goes on isn't "critically important," but it does develop characters (both through actual interaction and mechanical karma awards). I'm baaaaad at "inviting myself into" scenes these days, so my character's managed to appear in one non-primary-session scene (and only one primary session due to another being called off). And as more of these happen (whether I'm around or not), it only makes me feel more alienated and less inclined to dive in. I kind of wonder how there could be any other outcome, but clearly that kind of game setup works better for some people than it does for me.
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