Scattered Thoughts
Feh. So much distraction lately, and not in any good/planned way.
I've one friend in a very difficult time. The financial crunch is bad enough, but I'm more worried about the relationship side of things, as I feel like I may be watching a marriage disintegrate. Part of me boggles over the suggestions being tossed around, involving trying to get their footing again several states apart, and part of me says this was, perhaps, inevitable. Through it all, I only have a partial picture of everything, but what I see makes me... frustrated, shall we say.
And I'm torn between offering what help I can or... well... not. I do have a room and better financial grounding than most friends I know. But... I cannot see offering housing could work out well. Worst case, it's financially ruinous to me (I do okay, but supporting someone would require serious belt-tightening), I get fed up between the responsibility and loss of privacy, and we're both in worse shape. Best case, I find equalibrium again with a roommate and he gets a workable job here - but even that doesn't get him fully supporting himself or back together with wife and child. I don't see anything I consider a true "success" state being attainable this way. This makes me reluctant to really make the offer, which in turn makes me feel guilty for not sacrificing what I can to be a "good friend."
And some recent posting and discussion on other matters rattled around in my skull of late. Based on this, I had a little rant regarding religions with the discussion of being an "official" follower. I can see how churches/shrines may often rely on donations for everything, but to say someone has to pay dues in order to be spiritually "saved" or whatever just sticks in my craw. Thankfully, a priest of the Shinto shrine in question has communicated back and basically said otherwise, but that appears to be a hot button issue with me, connected with my general contempt for religious organizations (not to be confused with religions themselves).
It also sparked some thinking and talking about death with someone whose view pretty well mirrors my own. I really don't have any reason to fear death. I've no particular belief in a scary afterlife. I also don't have any especially strong ties to life. Certainly, I would be missed, but there is no one in my life who relies on me, no one who doesn't have another friends and family. There are a couple people who might argue otherwise, or be worried over my saying this, but I see no reason to be other than indifferent toward death. Mind you, that doesn't mean I have a desire to "end it all" either.
And while it's not a major thought in my mind, I have to say that mentioning your sexual orientation by roundabout way of a story in which you tell someone else is sort of burying the lead. "Wait, was that just what I thought that was?" Sure, it's pretty much irrelevant and changes nothing, but... sheesh. :p
And then today, I hear that a long-time employee has quit. No details on why, but it seems awful sudden.
I've one friend in a very difficult time. The financial crunch is bad enough, but I'm more worried about the relationship side of things, as I feel like I may be watching a marriage disintegrate. Part of me boggles over the suggestions being tossed around, involving trying to get their footing again several states apart, and part of me says this was, perhaps, inevitable. Through it all, I only have a partial picture of everything, but what I see makes me... frustrated, shall we say.
And I'm torn between offering what help I can or... well... not. I do have a room and better financial grounding than most friends I know. But... I cannot see offering housing could work out well. Worst case, it's financially ruinous to me (I do okay, but supporting someone would require serious belt-tightening), I get fed up between the responsibility and loss of privacy, and we're both in worse shape. Best case, I find equalibrium again with a roommate and he gets a workable job here - but even that doesn't get him fully supporting himself or back together with wife and child. I don't see anything I consider a true "success" state being attainable this way. This makes me reluctant to really make the offer, which in turn makes me feel guilty for not sacrificing what I can to be a "good friend."
And some recent posting and discussion on other matters rattled around in my skull of late. Based on this, I had a little rant regarding religions with the discussion of being an "official" follower. I can see how churches/shrines may often rely on donations for everything, but to say someone has to pay dues in order to be spiritually "saved" or whatever just sticks in my craw. Thankfully, a priest of the Shinto shrine in question has communicated back and basically said otherwise, but that appears to be a hot button issue with me, connected with my general contempt for religious organizations (not to be confused with religions themselves).
It also sparked some thinking and talking about death with someone whose view pretty well mirrors my own. I really don't have any reason to fear death. I've no particular belief in a scary afterlife. I also don't have any especially strong ties to life. Certainly, I would be missed, but there is no one in my life who relies on me, no one who doesn't have another friends and family. There are a couple people who might argue otherwise, or be worried over my saying this, but I see no reason to be other than indifferent toward death. Mind you, that doesn't mean I have a desire to "end it all" either.
And while it's not a major thought in my mind, I have to say that mentioning your sexual orientation by roundabout way of a story in which you tell someone else is sort of burying the lead. "Wait, was that just what I thought that was?" Sure, it's pretty much irrelevant and changes nothing, but... sheesh. :p
And then today, I hear that a long-time employee has quit. No details on why, but it seems awful sudden.
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