Magic and modern life

Conversation last night got me thinking. It wasn't even so much the way the utterance of the word "cucumber" really did seem to banish my housemate's hiccups, but rather a little question that came up afterward.

To be honest, I'm not sure what I believe these days.

I accept that magic can be real in some sense. I've always believed that much. It's easier to believe in subtler things that could be coincidence, though. I have to meet tales of flying toasters with a degree of skepticism (though I wasn't there, so I'm not about to say it *didn't* happen either).

There was a time when my belief was stronger. I was convinced will could shape reality if it were only strong enough. I never received any "formal" training, or even picked up a book on the subject to read. Yet in those days I was blamed for wilting an area of thistles, I tweaked weather patterns, and I could pull the Magic card I wanted from the top of a deck with unsettling frequency. Then there was a time I willed good fortune unto an online friend who was moving. When next I heard from her, I found out she'd been in a car accident. It wasn't serious and she wasn't hurt, but that shook me. Was it coincidence? Did my "magic" keep her from a worse fate? Or did my good intentions backfire and caused the mishap?

I couldn't answer those questions and I don't imagine I ever will. Since then, I've dabbled far, far less. Items all but sacred to me before remain rarely viewed or touched. My will has faded, I'm more jaded, and it's been harder to *believe*. I've become... "mundane." I miss who I was, but I don't know that I could go back even if I knew how.

Comments

  1. tashiroOctober 30, 2003 at 1:31 AM

    I still believe in magic, and I still believe people can perform magic themselves, if given the acceptance that it may work when they try something. I don't think anyone can be really prepared to face everything they can do, but the smaller rituals, the 'coincidences' isn't too hard. Then again, I still get blame from my roomies over the weather. ;)

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  2. alynnwellsOctober 30, 2003 at 12:52 PM

    That's because you've a tendency to tweak reality without taking a care for the world at large. ;P

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  3. alynnwellsOctober 30, 2003 at 2:27 PM

    I may not be the best person to comment on this, but . . . Caution is sensible. I always opine that Tashiro doesn't show enough of it. ;) You're careful with fire, you're careful with electricity, why shouldn't you be careful with belief? On the other hand, there's a fine line beyond which caution becomes fear. And decisions made out of fear are not always reliable. If there's too much fear involved, not playing around with the power of focused belief may be incredibly wise. As a corollary to that, however, not playing with that kind of power yourself does not negate its existence. If you knew at one time that you could accomplish things through force of will or strength of belief, stop to consider that maybe other people still can and still do. You can disbelieve in a hand grenade all you want, but it will still kill you if it goes off in your face.

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  4. marinredwolfOctober 31, 2003 at 12:35 AM

    Not the best person to comment? Tsk. Okay, perhaps "best" is difficult to discern, but you're precisely the person whose comments I wanted. I say I'm skeptical at times, and I am, but I accept that things are out there. To say I don't believe, though... I'm not sure how to explain. I accept there are forces out there. I accept some people may be able to do things with them. And yet, I don't perceive them myself. In day-to-day life I attribute things to coincidence, chance, or obvious cause and effect. I believe, but I don't *believe.* Still, I've always tried very hard to only speak for myself. Just because I haven't perceived something doesn't mean someone else hasn't either. I hear your stories and I wonder why I've never seen such things myself - but I'm not about to call you "wrong." In many ways, I feel you're enlightened to things I am now... and I'm a bit jealous in all honesty. But my own feelings are probably more complicated than that. Most of my passions in life died or dimmed about the same time, and part of me attributes that to a waning "belief" in magic.

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  5. northawkeNovember 18, 2003 at 1:37 PM

    On a sorta- similar vein... I was reading a favorite webcomic, Queen of Wands, and came across one that touched on faith and not knowing what can be done... http://www.queenofwands.net - look for the Weds Nov 19 strip. Not quite what you're thinking of... but maybe a bit along the "don't want to mess with what I don't understand". Anyhow, it just made me think of this post of yours. Thought you'd be intrigued.

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